The New Face of Terror
This is an article on news.com.au entitled Farts spark emergency landing
"AN American Airlines flight has made an emergency landing after a passenger with severe gas problems struck matches to mask the odour of flatulence.
The flight from Washington to Texas landed at Nashville airport, in the southeastern state of Tennessee, after passengers alerted the crew to the smell of burning sulphur.
Lynne Lowrance, a spokeswoman for Nashville International Airport Authority said all 99 passengers and their luggage were taken off the plane and searched.
An unlucky canine team was also brought in to sniff the aircraft for explosives.
After intense questioning by the FBI, a woman passenger admitted to lighting matches on board the aircraft to conceal her gas, Ms Lowrance said.
“For a long time she did not admit to striking matches and I think that was just out of embarrassment,” she said.
“She did finally admit to it saying she had a medical problem about excessive gas.”
The unidentified woman was not charged, but “American did ban her from flying on their airline for a very long time,” Ms Lowrance said. "
Now normally I'd see an article like this on the internet, parody it, have a laugh and confuse people as they don't know where the line is drawn between fact and fiction.
Finding this article I tend to think my work is already done. Afterall, this is the quintessential demonstration of our everyday lives being thrown into turmoil by fiction!
Granted, if I were a flight steward and smelt burning sulfur then I'd be wanting to land the plane as soon as possible and putting on my runners. Under any circumstance. Throw in the background hype of the war on terror, the 'where will they hit us next', the 'are our planes safe,' the 'will the attack the wheat industry', etc etc etc. I'd be making sure I had a good uniform allowance in those circumstances.
But this has gone too far, where a poor flatulent lady is vilified by mere fiction. Her victim to circumstance has banned her from American Airlines and made her the laughing stock of a nation. Thus let her actions be a precursor to us all, a trailblaze into falsehood. Unless we confront this distortion of truth then we cannot move forward as nations, let alone assist others in building nationhood. The war on terror is before us, however the truth cannot be denied!
Lighting a match does not disguise the smell of farts.
"AN American Airlines flight has made an emergency landing after a passenger with severe gas problems struck matches to mask the odour of flatulence.
The flight from Washington to Texas landed at Nashville airport, in the southeastern state of Tennessee, after passengers alerted the crew to the smell of burning sulphur.
Lynne Lowrance, a spokeswoman for Nashville International Airport Authority said all 99 passengers and their luggage were taken off the plane and searched.
An unlucky canine team was also brought in to sniff the aircraft for explosives.
After intense questioning by the FBI, a woman passenger admitted to lighting matches on board the aircraft to conceal her gas, Ms Lowrance said.
“For a long time she did not admit to striking matches and I think that was just out of embarrassment,” she said.
“She did finally admit to it saying she had a medical problem about excessive gas.”
The unidentified woman was not charged, but “American did ban her from flying on their airline for a very long time,” Ms Lowrance said. "
Now normally I'd see an article like this on the internet, parody it, have a laugh and confuse people as they don't know where the line is drawn between fact and fiction.
Finding this article I tend to think my work is already done. Afterall, this is the quintessential demonstration of our everyday lives being thrown into turmoil by fiction!
Granted, if I were a flight steward and smelt burning sulfur then I'd be wanting to land the plane as soon as possible and putting on my runners. Under any circumstance. Throw in the background hype of the war on terror, the 'where will they hit us next', the 'are our planes safe,' the 'will the attack the wheat industry', etc etc etc. I'd be making sure I had a good uniform allowance in those circumstances.
But this has gone too far, where a poor flatulent lady is vilified by mere fiction. Her victim to circumstance has banned her from American Airlines and made her the laughing stock of a nation. Thus let her actions be a precursor to us all, a trailblaze into falsehood. Unless we confront this distortion of truth then we cannot move forward as nations, let alone assist others in building nationhood. The war on terror is before us, however the truth cannot be denied!
Lighting a match does not disguise the smell of farts.
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....where contestants light their farts and then, well, it doesn't really matter who wins beyond that point.
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