The Roof, The Roof, The Roof is on fire - Audit of Australian Classrooms!
Victoria: An audit of 330 state schools has revealed that three out of four schools require urgent maintanence and were seriously understaffed.
One school was highlighted due to its bowing roof and flooded school hall. "Of course our school sucks," one of its students said, "we had a massive party there the weekend before the inspectors came!"
The Bracks Government announced a $35million dollar advertising campaign denying these "vicious rumours, after all Steve Bracks - Acts." Their advertisement, to be directed by Baz Luhrman and starring Australian starlet Nicole Kidman is said to be a 30 second dramatisation of Oliver "inside a hollowed out elephant."
Director Baz was very excited about the oncoming project, "Well as we all know there's no money going into Australian arts unless it's making campaign ads or decorating offices. So you need to take the opportunity whilst its there and this is mine."
When reminded about his $50 million Channel #5 opportunity, Luhrman replied, "Yeah well we dropped the ball on that one didn't we? So here's a new opportunity."
The Bracks Goverment is taking the media frenzy as an opportunity to release its new $3.25 scool rebuilding plan based on the sucessful model in Sudan. "If we put all the schools outside then we don't have to worry about structural flaws and flooding, it also means we don't need maximums on class sizes, just teach whoever is in earshot."
At least it's better than NSW!
One school was highlighted due to its bowing roof and flooded school hall. "Of course our school sucks," one of its students said, "we had a massive party there the weekend before the inspectors came!"
The Bracks Government announced a $35million dollar advertising campaign denying these "vicious rumours, after all Steve Bracks - Acts." Their advertisement, to be directed by Baz Luhrman and starring Australian starlet Nicole Kidman is said to be a 30 second dramatisation of Oliver "inside a hollowed out elephant."
The Bracks Iniative
When reminded about his $50 million Channel #5 opportunity, Luhrman replied, "Yeah well we dropped the ball on that one didn't we? So here's a new opportunity."
The Bracks Goverment is taking the media frenzy as an opportunity to release its new $3.25 scool rebuilding plan based on the sucessful model in Sudan. "If we put all the schools outside then we don't have to worry about structural flaws and flooding, it also means we don't need maximums on class sizes, just teach whoever is in earshot."
At least it's better than NSW!
